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I've never been totally comfortable hearing myself referred to as "he" and I never questioned why until recently. I don't identify with the male world or the expectations that are implied and I feel the structures of maleness need to be dismantled and recreated. I feel comfortable with the masculine parts of my outward expression but the internal is all feminine with me. From the time I was a kid I have always felt like I was a girl wearing a boy costume. I've grown to love and express both components and it wasn’t until recently that I kinda threw all of it out the window and realize I identify as something quite beyond the spectrum. In a way I feel more of a connection to the unknown and the mysteries of life and my (lack of) gender is the latest exploration of that. It makes me feel more interchangeable, which is more comfortable for me. I've always been a shapeshifter, I never let myself soak too long in one identity.[2]
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