Femme: Difference between revisions

'''Femme''' is a term that refers to a queer person whose [[gender expression]] is considered to be [[feminine]]. It was originally used to distinguish feminine lesbian and bisexual women from [[butch]] women, and it is still one of the main uses of the term. It is common for trans and nonbinary individuals to use the term to refer to their identity or expression even if they do not identify as lesbian or bisexual women.<ref name="Tonic">{{Cite web |title=What Does Femme Mean? The Difference Between Being Femme & Being Feminine |last=Tonic |first=Gina |work=Bustle |date=24 August 2016 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://www.bustle.com/articles/166081-what-does-femme-mean-the-difference-between-being-femme-being-feminine}}</ref> However, this last usage is a bit controversial.<ref name=":0">[http://lesbiansovereverything.com/on-the-appropriation-of-femme/ On the appropriation of femme] on Lesbians over everything (lesbiansovereverything.com)</ref> A common definition of femme is someone who queers or subverts femininity, as opposed to a butch person, who rejects femininity. <ref name="Shewan">{{Cite web |title=Are you Femme? What Femme Isn’t and What it is. |last=Shewan |first=Briana |work=affirmativecouch.com |date=15 February 2019 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://affirmativecouch.com/are-you-femme-what-femme-isnt-and-what-it-is/ |quote=Femmes may have any gender identity; some consider femme their gender identity, whileother femmes may have a different gender identity (such as transwoman, nonbinary, cis-woman, [[genderfluid]], [[agender]], etc.) and consider femme their gender expression}}</ref>

The word ''femme'' can only be used to describe people in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and it can be a synonym of the expression ''lipstick lesbian'' in some cases. That means that [[cisgender]] straight women should not use the term to describe themselves, as it would be considered appropriation.<ref group="note">Note that, in French, ''femme'' means ''woman.'' This article is about the English usage of this word.</ref> Because there are many stereotypes surrounding femininity, the term ''femme'' is often used to subvert cultural expectations about how a woman should look like. For this reason, many (but not all) people that identify as ''femme'' do not try to adhere to these stereotypes.<ref name="Tonic" /> This is similar to how the word ''queer'' was reclaimed by the LGBTQ community.

Although originally the term ''femme'' was used to describe women only, its usage has been expanded to the nonbinary community.<ref name="Shewan" /> It is rarely used as a standalone identity, as it normally describes nonbinary people that have a feminine gender expression. This might lead to difficulties for the femme-identifying individual caused by the false assumption that all nonbinary people have an [[Androgyny|androgynous]] expression.<ref name="smith">{{Cite web |title=Beyond the binary: Yes, nonbinary femmes exist |last=smith |first=s.e. |work=this ain't livin' |date=27 April 2015 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= http://meloukhia.net/2015/04/beyond_the_binary_yes_nonbinary_femmes_exist/ }}</ref>