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    [[File:Butch Femme Society by David Shankbone.jpg|thumb|The Butch/Femme Society marching at NYC Gay Pride Parade 2007.]]
    '''Femme''' is a term that refers to a queer person whose [[gender expression]] is considered to be [[feminine]]. It was originally used to distinguish feminine lesbian and bisexual women from [[butch]] women, and it is still one of the main uses of the term. It is common for trans and nonbinary individuals to use the term to refer to their identity or expression even if they do not identify as lesbian or bisexual women.<ref name="Tonic">{{Cite web |title=What Does Femme Mean? The Difference Between Being Femme & Being Feminine |last=Tonic |first=Gina |work=Bustle |date=24 August 2016 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://www.bustle.com/articles/166081-what-does-femme-mean-the-difference-between-being-femme-being-feminine}}</ref> However, this last usage is a bit controversial.<ref name=":0">[http://lesbiansovereverything.com/on-the-appropriation-of-femme/ On the appropriation of femme] on Lesbians over everything (lesbiansovereverything.com)</ref> A common definition of femme is someone who queers or subverts femininity, as opposed to a butch person, who rejects femininity. <ref name="Shewan">{{Cite web |title=Are you Femme? What Femme Isn’t and What it is. |last=Shewan |first=Briana |work=affirmativecouch.com |date=15 February 2019 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://affirmativecouch.com/are-you-femme-what-femme-isnt-and-what-it-is/ |quote=Femmes may have any gender identity; some consider femme their gender identity, whileother femmes may have a different gender identity (such as transwoman, nonbinary, cis-woman, [[genderfluid]], [[agender]], etc.) and consider femme their gender expression}}</ref>
    '''Femme''' is a term that refers to a queer person whose [[gender expression]] is considered to be [[feminine]]. It was originally used to distinguish feminine lesbian and bisexual women from [[butch]] women, and it is still one of the main uses of the term. It is common for trans and nonbinary individuals to use the term to refer to their identity or expression even if they do not identify as lesbian or bisexual women.<ref name="Tonic">{{Cite web |title=What Does Femme Mean? The Difference Between Being Femme & Being Feminine |last=Tonic |first=Gina |work=Bustle |date=24 August 2016 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://www.bustle.com/articles/166081-what-does-femme-mean-the-difference-between-being-femme-being-feminine}}</ref> However, this last usage is a bit controversial.<ref name=":0">[http://lesbiansovereverything.com/on-the-appropriation-of-femme/ On the appropriation of femme] on Lesbians over everything (lesbiansovereverything.com)</ref> A common definition of femme is someone who queers or subverts femininity, as opposed to a butch person, who rejects femininity. <ref name="Shewan">{{Cite web |title=Are you Femme? What Femme Isn’t and What it is. |last=Shewan |first=Briana |work=affirmativecouch.com |date=15 February 2019 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://affirmativecouch.com/are-you-femme-what-femme-isnt-and-what-it-is/ |quote=Femmes may have any gender identity; some consider femme their gender identity, whileother femmes may have a different gender identity (such as transwoman, nonbinary, cis-woman, [[genderfluid]], [[agender]], etc.) and consider femme their gender expression}}</ref>


    International Femme Appreciation Day is celebrated on the first Saturday of July.<ref name="Lapachet">{{Cite web |title=International Femme Appreciation Day |last=Lapachet |first=María |work=A Femme in NYC |date=3 July 2014 |access-date=22 June 2020 |url= https://afemmeinnyc.wordpress.com/2014/07/03/international-femme-appreciation-day-2/}}</ref><ref name="QE">{{Cite web |title=Lesbian Culture & Visibility |author= |work=QueerEvents.ca |date= |access-date=22 June 2020 |url= https://queerevents.ca/queer-culture/lesbian-visibility}}</ref>
    International Femme Appreciation Day is celebrated on the first Saturday of July.<ref name="Lapachet">{{Cite web |title=International Femme Appreciation Day |last=Lapachet |first=María |work=A Femme in NYC |date=3 July 2014 |access-date=22 June 2020 |url= https://afemmeinnyc.wordpress.com/2014/07/03/international-femme-appreciation-day-2/}}</ref><ref name="QE">{{Cite web |title=Lesbian Culture & Visibility |author= |work=QueerEvents.ca |date= |access-date=22 June 2020 |url= https://queerevents.ca/queer-culture/lesbian-visibility}}</ref>


    == Difference between ''femme'' and ''feminine'' ==
    == Usage ==
    The word ''femme'' can only be used to describe people in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and it can be a synonym of the expression ''lipstick lesbian'' in some cases. That means that [[cisgender]] straight women should not use the term to describe themselves, as it would be considered appropriation.<ref group="note">Note that, in French, ''femme'' means ''woman.'' This article is about the English usage of this word.</ref> Because there are many stereotypes surrounding femininity, the term ''femme'' is often used to subvert cultural expectations about how a woman should look like. For this reason, many (but not all) people that identify as ''femme'' do not try to adhere to these stereotypes.<ref name="Tonic" /> This is similar to how the word ''queer'' was reclaimed by the LGBTQ community.
    Some argue that the word ''femme'' can only be used to describe people in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and it can be a synonym of the expression ''lipstick lesbian'' in some cases. That means that [[cisgender]] straight women should not use the term to describe themselves, as it would be considered appropriation.<ref group="note">Note that, in French, ''femme'' means ''woman.'' This article is about the English usage of this word.</ref> Because there are many stereotypes surrounding femininity, the term ''femme'' is often used to subvert cultural expectations about how a woman should look like. For this reason, many (but not all) people that identify as ''femme'' do not try to adhere to these stereotypes.<ref name="Tonic" /> This is similar to how the word ''queer'' was reclaimed by the LGBTQ community.


    == Usage within the nonbinary community ==
    Femme has been used for women as well as for people who identify outside of the gender binary.<ref name="Shewan" /> Nonbinary femmes struggle against the misconception that nonbinary people must have an [[Androgyny|androgynous]] expression, since their own expression is feminine.<ref name="smith">{{Cite web |title=Beyond the binary: Yes, nonbinary femmes exist |last=smith |first=s.e. |work=this ain't livin' |date=27 April 2015 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= http://meloukhia.net/2015/04/beyond_the_binary_yes_nonbinary_femmes_exist/ }}</ref>
    Although originally the term ''femme'' was used to describe women only, its usage has been expanded to the nonbinary community.<ref name="Shewan" /> It is rarely used as a standalone identity, as it normally describes nonbinary people that have a feminine gender expression. This might lead to difficulties for the femme-identifying individual caused by the false assumption that all nonbinary people have an [[Androgyny|androgynous]] expression.<ref name="smith">{{Cite web |title=Beyond the binary: Yes, nonbinary femmes exist |last=smith |first=s.e. |work=this ain't livin' |date=27 April 2015 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= http://meloukhia.net/2015/04/beyond_the_binary_yes_nonbinary_femmes_exist/ }}</ref>


    === Controversy ===
    Some people claim that in the same way that nobody uses the words ''bear'' or ''twink'' unless they are gay men, nobody should use words such as ''femme'' or ''butch'' unless they are women. Therefore, they consider it appropriation.<ref name=":0" />
    The usage of this term by people who do not identify as women is a bit controversial. Some people claim that in the same way that nobody uses the words ''bear'' or ''twink'' unless they are gay men, nobody should use words such as ''femme'' or ''butch'' unless they are women. Therefore, they consider it appropriation.<ref name=":0" />


    ==Flags==
    ==Flags==
    There is no universally-accepted flag for the femme identity, but several have been proposed. Below are some of them.
    There is no universally-accepted flag for the femme identity, but several have been proposed. Below are some of them.
    <gallery>
    <gallery>
    File:Femme flag by disasterbisexual.png  
    File:Femme flag by disasterbisexual.png|designed by disasterbisexual
    File:Femme flag by momma-mogai-sphinx.png
    File:Femme flag by momma-mogai-sphinx.png|designed by momma-mogai-sphinx
    File:Femme flag by 0biz.png
    File:Femme flag by 0biz.png|designed by 0biz
    File:Fem(me) flag by butch-pentious.png
    File:Fem(me) flag by butch-pentious.png|designed by butch-pentious
    File:Femmegender2.png|A flag for "nonbinary femme" from Beyond Mogai Pride Flags
    </gallery>
    </gallery>


    == Notable femme people ==
    == Notable femme people ==


    There are many more [[notable nonbinary people|notable people who have a gender identity outside of the binary]]. The following are only some of those notable people who specifically use the word "femme" (or a close analog to it) for themselves as a gender identity.  
    [[File:Kate Bornstein2010.jpg|thumb|200px|[[Kate Bornstein]], a nonbinary femme-identified trans person.]]


    * Multimedia artist [[Dev Blair]] is a nonbinary femme.<ref>{{cite tweet|user=Dev_Blair|number=956701170503954432|title=Starting 2 prefer "they" pronouns because so many people wanna equate "she" pronouns w/ me being a woman n that's not really what I mean when I say non-binary femme-what I mean is my gender is neither male nor female but I do strongly align with femininity|date=25 January 2018}}</ref>
    There are many more [[notable nonbinary people|notable people who have a gender identity outside of the binary]]. The following are only some of those notable people who specifically describe their own identity by the name "femme," "fem," or a close analog to it.


    ''Please help expand this section.''
    * [[Dev Blair]] is a multimedia artist who is a nonbinary femme.<ref>{{cite tweet|user=Dev_Blair|number=956701170503954432|title=Starting 2 prefer "they" pronouns because so many people wanna equate "she" pronouns w/ me being a woman n that's not really what I mean when I say non-binary femme-what I mean is my gender is neither male nor female but I do strongly align with femininity|date=25 January 2018}}</ref>
    * [[Kate Bornstein]] (b. 1948) is an author, playwright, performance artist, and gender theorist. Bornstein is "a non-binary femme-identified trans person".<ref name="Raymond">{{Cite web |title=Interview: Kate Bornstein on Their Broadway Debut in Straight White Men |last=Raymond |first=Gerard |work=Slant Magazine |date=July 11, 2018 |access-date=May 16, 2020 |url= https://www.slantmagazine.com/interviews/pretty-damn-bowie-kate-bornstein-on-their-broadway-debut-in-straight-white-men/}}</ref>
    * [[Sand Chang|Sand C. Chang]], PhD., is a Chinese-American clinical psychologist and educator.<ref name="tran_Sand">{{Cite web |title=Sand Chang |author= |work=Trans Bodies, Trans Selves |date= |access-date=6 April 2020 |url= http://transbodies.com/people/sand-chang-2/}}</ref> Dr. Chang is one of the authors of ''A Clinician's Guide to Gender-Affirming Care: Working with Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Clients''. They are [[nonbinary]], [[genderqueer]], [[genderfluid]], [[demiboy]],<ref name="yout_Ep69">{{Cite web |title=Ep 69 Dr. Sand Chang Licensed Psychologist Interview |last=Kramer |first=Kaiya |work=The Queer Life Radio |date=11 December 2015 |access-date=6 April 2020 |url= https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GtFtRleENew}}</ref> and femme.<ref name="Harrison">{{Cite web |title=Food Psych #150: Disordered Eating & Gender Identity with Sand Chang |first=Christy|last= Harrison |date=2 April 2018 |access-date=28 April 2020 |url= https://christyharrison.com/foodpsych/5/eating-disorder-recovery-gender-identity-with-sand-chang}}</ref>
    * [[Sharon daVanport]] is an activist who founded what is now the Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network (formerly Autism Women's Network<ref name="Ho">{{Cite web |title=Disability & Intersectionality Summit: Interview with Sharon daVanport |author=Ho, Sandy |work=Disability Visibility Project |date=7 May 2018 |access-date=28 May 2020 |url= https://disabilityvisibilityproject.com/2018/05/07/disability-intersectionality-summit-interview-with-sharon-davanport/}}</ref>). DaVanport is a nonbinary femme.<ref name="ECE">{{Cite web |title=PEOPLE: Why Sharon daVanport built a support network for autistic women and nonbinary people |author= |work=Echo Chamber Escape |date=May 26, 2020 |access-date=May 28, 2020 |url= https://echochamberescape.com/2020/05/26/people-why-sharon-davanport-built-a-support-network-for-autistic-women-and-nonbinary-people</ref>
    * [[Sassafras Lowrey]] is an author and journalist, known for hir books about dogs.<ref name="Metraux">{{Cite web |title=How Sassafras Lowrey Made Writing About Dogs a Career |last=Métraux |first=Julia |work=Narratively |date=6 March 2020 |access-date=8 May 2020 |url= https://narratively.com/how-sassafras-lowrey-made-writing-about-dogs-a-career/}}</ref> Lowrey is [[genderqueer]], [[trans]], femme, queer, polyamorous, and [[asexual]].<ref>{{cite tweet|user= sassafraslowrey|number= 1182723625448685568|date=11 October 2019|title=and to have made a core aspect of my career around writing the queerest books and stories I can imagine. Happy #NationalComingOutDay Queerly yours a: #runaway, formerly #homeless, #genderqueer, #trans, #femme, #queer, #polyamorous, #asexual, #little, #leather boy}}</ref>
     
    {{Clear}}


    == See also ==
    == See also ==

    Revision as of 05:27, 2 July 2020

    The Butch/Femme Society marching at NYC Gay Pride Parade 2007.

    Femme is a term that refers to a queer person whose gender expression is considered to be feminine. It was originally used to distinguish feminine lesbian and bisexual women from butch women, and it is still one of the main uses of the term. It is common for trans and nonbinary individuals to use the term to refer to their identity or expression even if they do not identify as lesbian or bisexual women.[1] However, this last usage is a bit controversial.[2] A common definition of femme is someone who queers or subverts femininity, as opposed to a butch person, who rejects femininity. [3]

    International Femme Appreciation Day is celebrated on the first Saturday of July.[4][5]

    Usage

    Some argue that the word femme can only be used to describe people in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and it can be a synonym of the expression lipstick lesbian in some cases. That means that cisgender straight women should not use the term to describe themselves, as it would be considered appropriation.[note 1] Because there are many stereotypes surrounding femininity, the term femme is often used to subvert cultural expectations about how a woman should look like. For this reason, many (but not all) people that identify as femme do not try to adhere to these stereotypes.[1] This is similar to how the word queer was reclaimed by the LGBTQ community.

    Femme has been used for women as well as for people who identify outside of the gender binary.[3] Nonbinary femmes struggle against the misconception that nonbinary people must have an androgynous expression, since their own expression is feminine.[6]

    Some people claim that in the same way that nobody uses the words bear or twink unless they are gay men, nobody should use words such as femme or butch unless they are women. Therefore, they consider it appropriation.[2]

    Flags

    There is no universally-accepted flag for the femme identity, but several have been proposed. Below are some of them.

    • designed by disasterbisexual

      designed by disasterbisexual

    • designed by momma-mogai-sphinx

      designed by momma-mogai-sphinx

    • designed by 0biz

      designed by 0biz

    • designed by butch-pentious

      designed by butch-pentious

    • A flag for "nonbinary femme" from Beyond Mogai Pride Flags

      A flag for "nonbinary femme" from Beyond Mogai Pride Flags

    Notable femme people

    Kate Bornstein, a nonbinary femme-identified trans person.

    There are many more notable people who have a gender identity outside of the binary. The following are only some of those notable people who specifically describe their own identity by the name "femme," "fem," or a close analog to it.

    • Dev Blair is a multimedia artist who is a nonbinary femme.[7]
    • Kate Bornstein (b. 1948) is an author, playwright, performance artist, and gender theorist. Bornstein is "a non-binary femme-identified trans person".[8]
    • Sand C. Chang, PhD., is a Chinese-American clinical psychologist and educator.[9] Dr. Chang is one of the authors of A Clinician's Guide to Gender-Affirming Care: Working with Transgender and Gender Nonconforming Clients. They are nonbinary, genderqueer, genderfluid, demiboy,[10] and femme.[11]
    • Sharon daVanport is an activist who founded what is now the Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network (formerly Autism Women's Network[12]). DaVanport is a nonbinary femme.[13]
    • Sassafras Lowrey is an author and journalist, known for hir books about dogs.[14] Lowrey is genderqueer, trans, femme, queer, polyamorous, and asexual.[15]

    See also

    Further information

    • Donish, Cassie (5 December 2017). "Five Queer People on What 'Femme' Means to Them". Vice. Retrieved 8 June 2020. (note: article contains reclaimed slurs)
    • "The Many Definitions (and the Continuing Evolution) of the Word "Femme"". them. 19 July 2018. Retrieved 13 June 2020.

    References

    1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 Tonic, Gina (24 August 2016). "What Does Femme Mean? The Difference Between Being Femme & Being Feminine". Bustle. Retrieved 28 April 2020.
    2. ↑ 2.0 2.1 On the appropriation of femme on Lesbians over everything (lesbiansovereverything.com)
    3. ↑ 3.0 3.1 Shewan, Briana (15 February 2019). "Are you Femme? What Femme Isn't and What it is". affirmativecouch.com. Retrieved 28 April 2020. Femmes may have any gender identity; some consider femme their gender identity, whileother femmes may have a different gender identity (such as transwoman, nonbinary, cis-woman, genderfluid, agender, etc.) and consider femme their gender expression
    4. ↑ Lapachet, María (3 July 2014). "International Femme Appreciation Day". A Femme in NYC. Retrieved 22 June 2020.
    5. ↑ "Lesbian Culture & Visibility". QueerEvents.ca. Retrieved 22 June 2020.
    6. ↑ smith, s.e. (27 April 2015). "Beyond the binary: Yes, nonbinary femmes exist". this ain't livin'. Retrieved 28 April 2020.
    7. ↑ @Dev_Blair (25 January 2018). "Starting 2 prefer "they" pronouns because so many people wanna equate "she" pronouns w/ me being a woman n that's not really what I mean when I say non-binary femme-what I mean is my gender is neither male nor female but I do strongly align with femininity" – via Twitter.
    8. ↑ Raymond, Gerard (July 11, 2018). "Interview: Kate Bornstein on Their Broadway Debut in Straight White Men". Slant Magazine. Retrieved May 16, 2020.
    9. ↑ "Sand Chang". Trans Bodies, Trans Selves. Retrieved 6 April 2020.
    10. ↑ Kramer, Kaiya (11 December 2015). "Ep 69 Dr. Sand Chang Licensed Psychologist Interview". The Queer Life Radio. Retrieved 6 April 2020.
    11. ↑ Harrison, Christy (2 April 2018). "Food Psych #150: Disordered Eating & Gender Identity with Sand Chang". Retrieved 28 April 2020.
    12. ↑ Ho, Sandy (7 May 2018). "Disability & Intersectionality Summit: Interview with Sharon daVanport". Disability Visibility Project. Retrieved 28 May 2020.
    13. ↑ {{Cite web |title=PEOPLE: Why Sharon daVanport built a support network for autistic women and nonbinary people |author= |work=Echo Chamber Escape |date=May 26, 2020 |access-date=May 28, 2020 |url= https://echochamberescape.com/2020/05/26/people-why-sharon-davanport-built-a-support-network-for-autistic-women-and-nonbinary-people
    14. ↑ Métraux, Julia (6 March 2020). "How Sassafras Lowrey Made Writing About Dogs a Career". Narratively. Retrieved 8 May 2020.
    15. ↑ @sassafraslowrey (11 October 2019). "and to have made a core aspect of my career around writing the queerest books and stories I can imagine. Happy #NationalComingOutDay Queerly yours a: #runaway, formerly #homeless, #genderqueer, #trans, #femme, #queer, #polyamorous, #asexual, #little, #leather boy" – via Twitter.

    Notes

    1. ↑ Note that, in French, femme means woman. This article is about the English usage of this word.
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