Sinclair Sexsmith

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Sinclair Sexsmith is a writer and performer. They identify as a "White non-binary butch feminist dominant".[1] Their website, Sugarbutch, which they started in 2006, "contains explicit writings on kink practices, dominant/submissive relationships, and queer kink erotica (among other things)." ​Their short story collection, Sweet & Rough: Queer Kink Erotica, was a 2016 finalist for the Lambda Literary Award. Sexsmith uses singular they and the prefix Mx.

Quotes[edit | edit source]

"I am ever aware of the heteronormativity and cissexism in the BDSM worlds, and I think queers are doing amazing things to call attention to, work on, and transform what it means to explore gender, or explore power dynamics."[2]

"Dear cis people who put your pronouns on your “hello my name is” name tags: Thank you. When you do that, I feel more comfortable putting my pronouns — they/them. I feel more comfortable being visibly out as nonbinary. I feel more comfortable asking people to use the pronouns that feel most like me, that make me feel most seen and whole, instead of just resolving to be mis-gendered and mis-represented and whatever who cares anyway."[3]

"It's been a long, slow road to this version of me. It's taken a long time and a LOT of experiments, a lot of wardrobe changes, a lot of trial and error. And I'm still changing all the time, still seeking ways to become the most 'me' I can be. I had really excellent teachers who inspired me while I was coming out and coming into butchness and queerness, which really helped. I have very supportive parents and siblings, and I've always been very stubborn about doing my own thing and expressing my own way, since I was young. I've leaned on the many communities I've been a part of, and have felt so supported and lifted up by the generosity — I've learned so much by being part of communities and groups."[4]

References[edit | edit source]

  1. "Sinclair Sexsmith profile". Medium. Retrieved 9 April 2020.
  2. Yates, Carolyn (8 April 2012). "Sinclair Sexsmith on "Say Please: Lesbian BDSM Erotica": The Autostraddle Interview". Autostraddle. Retrieved 9 April 2020.
  3. Sexsmith, Sinclair (20 April 2019). "Dear (Cis) People Who Put Your Pronouns On Your "Hello My Name Is" Name Tags". Medium. Retrieved 9 April 2020.
  4. "An Interview with Sinclair Sexsmith: A Very Sexy Butch Wordsmith". ButchOnTap. 22 September 2014. Retrieved 9 April 2020.