Femme is a term that refers to a queer person whose gender expression is considered to be feminine. It was originally used to distinguish feminine lesbian and bisexual women from butch women, and it is still one of the main uses of the term. It is common for trans and nonbinary individuals to use the term to refer to their identity or expression even if they do not identify as lesbian or bisexual women.[1] However, this last usage is has been gatekept by trans-exclusionary members of the lesbian community.[2] A common definition of femme is someone who queers or subverts femininity, as opposed to a butch person, who rejects femininity.[3] Femme is also sometimes used as a gender in itself.[4]

The Butch/Femme Society marching at NYC Gay Pride Parade 2007.

International Femme Appreciation Day is celebrated on the first Saturday of July.[5][6]

UsageEdit

Some argue that the word femme[note 1] can only be used to describe people in the LGBTQ+ spectrum, and it can be a synonym of the expression lipstick lesbian in some cases. Because there are many stereotypes surrounding femininity, the term femme is often used to subvert cultural expectations about how a woman should look like. For this reason, many (but not all) people that identify as femme do not try to adhere to these stereotypes.[1] This is similar to how the word queer was reclaimed by the LGBTQ community.

Femme has been used for women as well as men[7][8][9][10], and also for people outside of the gender binary.[3][11][12] Nonbinary femmes struggle against the misconception that nonbinary people must have an androgynous expression, since their own expression is feminine.[13]

Some people claim that in the same way that nobody uses the words bear or twink unless they are gay men, nobody should use words such as femme or butch unless they are women. Therefore, they consider it appropriation.[2]

FlagsEdit

There is no universally-accepted flag for the femme identity, but several have been proposed. Below are some of them.

Notable femme peopleEdit

 
Kate Bornstein, a nonbinary femme-identified trans person.
 
Nikkita Oliver, a genderfluid femme person.

There are many more notable people who have a gender identity outside of the binary. The following are only some of those notable people who specifically describe their own identity by the name "femme," "fem," or a close analog to it, and who do not identify as just men or women.

See alsoEdit

Further readingEdit

  • Donish, Cassie (5 December 2017). "Five Queer People on What 'Femme' Means to Them". Vice. Archived from the original on 17 July 2023. Retrieved 8 June 2020. (note: article contains reclaimed slurs)
  • "The Many Definitions (and the Continuing Evolution) of the Word "Femme"". them. 19 July 2018. Archived from the original on 17 July 2023. Retrieved 13 June 2020.
  • "What We Mean When We Say "Femme": A Roundtable". Autostraddle. 18 July 2016. Archived from the original on 17 July 2023. Retrieved 25 August 2020.
  • Levitt, Heidi M. (2003). "The Misunderstood Gender: A Model of Modern Femme Identity". Sex Roles. 48.

ReferencesEdit

  1. 1.0 1.1 Tonic, Gina (24 August 2016). "What Does Femme Mean? The Difference Between Being Femme & Being Feminine". Bustle. Archived from the original on 17 July 2023. Retrieved 28 April 2020.